Are regrets when you end a separation normal?

[trytryagain]

well, i guess that's what we're all here for, isn't it? to give each other insight and perspective?

i have to say, i was REALLY hesitant about the motorcycle. first of all, it's $7k we could have spent on something else (i.e. paying off debts, or saving towards a trip somewhere). secondly, i am a big NINNY BABY and was terrified at the thought of being on the back of that thing. but he took the safety class and got his license and i've never once felt afraid when i was riding with him. we've actually taken some really amazing rides out to the wine country around where we live, and i always loved seeing him pull up in front of our building on it. so, in a way, it was never MY dream, but by accepting his and allowing him to fulfill it, it became something we could do together and something that actually brought us closer (well...until now!).

i can't imagine that your wife doesn't have ANY dreams. everyone has dreams. they may not be wild, they may be something as simple as having a family and a loving home. i've told my H about my dreams to travel with him, to go to italy together, or even a road trip to yosemite...but like i said, they get put on the back burner because he's starting a new business or we've spent outside our budget that month. he's just not as interested in traveling as i am, but i'm pretty sure i can say that i straight up TELL HIM about those dreams.

maybe her dream has been to be a mother. i know that's all my mom ever wanted out of her life. i can tell you this much, though...being married to someone with ADHD, especially someone who has such big goals and aspirations, has very often in the past left me feeling like i'm not exciting enough or interesting enough for my H. like he's bigger than life, so how on earth could i possibly hold his interest for very long when the next big thing is always just around the corner? i can't say that your W feels that way, i'm just saying how i've felt in my own M. i'm definitely insecure and have self esteem issues...not because he's made me FEEL unimportant or anything, just because i think, how on earth could i EVER be enough for this man?