She is supposed to call around and talk to some attorneys/mediators today. If she finds one she is wanting to make an appointment during my work hours for us to go. Issue is that I have a deadline that I really need to keep this week at work. So would asking her to wait for the appointment until I can get this completed before I take a day off work be the right thing to do? Or would that be pushing her farther away? (Remember my first post about putting things off)
Do not ask her for permission; she is not your mommy. You are a man. If you have a project at work, then you are not available, period. She doesn't have to like it.
"I'm sorry, W, but that doesn't work for me. It will have to be <insert time/date/etc. here>."
One of the big things that happens to men in a M is they become sort of passive and do whatever is necessary to keep the peace. Sometimes we women beat the man out of you. The thing is, women don't respect men who roll over for them and don't act like men, and women can't be sexually attracted to men they don't respect.
It's what happened in my M...I had emotionally walked away, but know what happened when my H dropped the bomb and I couldn't talk him out of it like I'd been able to with every other thing in our M? I took notice and respected the hell out of him. And then I DB'd my butt off to get him back.
Any chance your W might feel the same way?
SD
Me: 40 H: 43 H had EA from 2/06-9/06 Bomb 5/06 Piecing since 9/2006 3/2008: Boundary setting 7/2009: Boundary crossing~dropped my own bomb. 8/2010: Marriage finally on track!
