Hi CW,
I think your DB coach is on to something. That is something my H mentioned several times. I seemed to be so independent, strong and capable and OW was a "damsel in distress" and he got to be the hero with her. I have been experimenting with reaching out to him more, asking his advice, needing him more... but not too much! It seems to be something he needs. I think your coach gave you a good plan!