OK, this is the last post I am making on this thread... blackskys you are doing EVERYTHING experts (real experts, not your IC) are reccomending NOT to do.
1. Why are you negotiating with your spouse over this? They aren't in the right mind right now... you are reasoning with an addict, its a waste of time
2. Why are you going to a counsellor who is obviously out of touch with modern Family Therapy practices.. again Michele Davis is quite clear in her book about this... drop the IC... there are a million bad ones out there and you have one of them...
3. Stop thinking this through, you aren't in the healthiest mind to make allt hese choices.. you need to start following Michele's stategies here and GAL. No where in DR does she reccomend you agonise daily over an affair. She reccomends combatting the affair and the person who is attacking your house hold...
I apologize in advance, but this whole thing has me very angry right now... When there was an affair going on in my home there were a lot of people thinking like you surrounding my wife and it allowed that affair to run for a VERY LONG TIME... my LIFE was on hold during that time and was being played with my a bunch of manipulative children who didn't know how to make adult decisions... and I see the same thing here...
It's time to be an adult blackskys... that means putting an end to hurtful childish games and showing some leadership and maturity in your home... Not agonizing over how everyone feels right now... the feelings you are worried about are those of selfish hurtful children... and they don't deserve to be catered to like this they deserve a time OUT and an ADULT to guide them.
