I must have missed the part where she says she's willing to end all contact with her boyfriend. Did I miss that?
GHM, I'm not familiar with your sitch, but I was asked to stop by and just give my opinion on the words she is using. To me, she sounds like she's still in Stage 2 in what I call the 4 Stages of Remorse:
I do think your wife is in one of the stages of remorse, but there are several stages. They'll go from "I'm sorry I got caught," to "I'm sorry for ME that I've messed myself up so much," to "I'm sorry for YOU that I hurt you (but I still don't see anything wrong with what I did)," to finally a more self-aware "I'm sorry for what I did because IT WAS THE WRONG THING TO DO, on so many levels. For me, for the pain I caused my husband, for the breaking of my vows, etc."
But again, I haven't followed your situation. Would she be willing to send OM a no-contact letter, and enter into full transparency with you?
