Not sure if this qualifies as piecing or not...

[TrentC]

Or worse, that she will rediscover herself but feel like she can never talk to me again because I wouldn't be able to forgive her.

I know I'm replying to myself, but I just want to say that I can forgive her for my sake; as part of the grieving process for the marriage, I'd have to.

I could forgive her for her sake, if she were interested in trying again. But it would be a new relationship, from the beginning. I would insist on counseling for her AND for us.

And I could leave the door open for that, but not forever. It would be many months before I could even consider getting into a serious relationship with anyone, let alone contemplate marriage again. But I'm not my father; I would not leave another relationship to try to rekindle one with her.