Try not to obsess. He might be shoving it in your face that though he's in MC with you and spending time with you it's his right to spend all these weekends having fun without you. It could be a withdrawal reaction to the positive babysteps. No way to know.
I'm now regretting telling him I'm too busy for him to see S tomorrrow until the evening. Will be seen by H as "freaking out over nothing" and what if I am! Then I will be making things worse when things were going so well. What to do? What if this is all in my mind that he's trying to play games or has an OW .... I'll definitely be the one seen as controlling! Help?
So what you told him you were busy so be busy, can you not go out and arrive back at the house about the time H is coming over.. You are allowed to say NO Hope, that is NO Hope not NO HOPE lol!
If he can go galivanting at the weekend what ever he is up too you can do your own thing too, control works both ways..
How can he tell your freaking out about nothing, your mind reading stop it! Dont allow him control take it back you can do it you dont need to be at his beck and call.. Again with the OW until you have proof stop panicking, he could be doing anything the more you freak the less likely he is gonna tell you what he was doing, the more happy and content with your lot you seem the more likely he is to share what he is doing.. Believe me when ever H said he was doing this or doing that I used to feel sick but I was b*ggered if he was ever gonna know about it..
Small 2x4 for Hope dont panic until you have too hun!
____________________________
W 47 H 47 M 24 T 30
Once lost but now found and happily married again!
I agree with LR. Stop freaking out. Arrive back home with S at the time he's showing up. Then it's not "freaking out over nothing." You actually were busy and actually made plans, which is fine and GAL.
Also, if you freak out in your own mind no one has a window into it. Just calm yourself down by the time you see him. When you can't control your thoughts, you can control your behavior.
Try to get back to the place where you remember that the roller coaster is more exhausting than it's worth. The panic is a reflex and you can train yourself out of it over time.
OK, trying to control my freakout. I know H will be furious that I'm "controlling" his time with S. He wants to pick him up at 1p, I said we'd be done by 5. I may txt back and say we can comprimise at 3p. I am going to wait though, even though I know he's blowing his top right now at me!
You could compromise on the time AND offer him some extra time with S later in the week to make up for you taking some of his to go elsewhere. That way he is not denied access to time with S. but you can still have your afternoon with S.
Don't assume he's furious! He very well may be, but if you assume he is, that will taint your next interaction with him and he will sense it. Act as if he has no reason to be mad. Be friendly, cheerful, etc. like there's nothing "wrong".
Me38,H:38,S:7 Married:6/99 Bomb:7/04 Sep.:5/05 D Filed:3/08;Final 1/10 Piecing:11/09 H moved back:09/10 Current thread: http://tiny.cc/htcty
