You know, after everything that has happened, I dont think taking care of ourselves and feeling OK about it, is bad, the opposite, I think that is the trick to get out of the hole...
I am trying to stabilize the same "attitude", it's not easy with my H being all over the place. BUT, he needs to take care of himself, he made it clear with our separation we are 2 different people, we are not one anymore, I learnt my lesson, I am doing the best I can to take care of me. We are in similar phases. Good luck and stay strong, K
