I think her husband finally wore her down with lots evals and court proceedings to push for school so that she would have to work and he would pay less child support Classy huh!
M38, H37 S3, S7 Together 15 yrs Married 8 yrs Bomb July 2008 Inhouse separation "I hate you" "We are over" (too many times to count) Reconciled Sept 2009 (still worth it)
You are correct, your H's BS is not your problem. If he has no bed, bookcase or no "anything" not your problem. It doesn't mean you can't have empathy but for now, he has chosen a life that does not include you as a W. You can't control that choice but you also don't have to go over and beyond to make it a comfortable choice for him.
I think you might disagree but I would stop making yourself so available to him, stop working around his schedule, start making him wonder what you are up to and worry a lot less about his issues.
S was diagnosed with autism and possible psychiatric problems today. Words fail me.
me: 42 | STBXH: 41 | T: 18 | M: 10 | separation: Jan 3, 2010 | they deserve better: S7 & D4 current thread: http://tinyurl.com/3y8sxcp .: first breathe, then heal, then start LIVING :.
M38, H37 S3, S7 Together 15 yrs Married 8 yrs Bomb July 2008 Inhouse separation "I hate you" "We are over" (too many times to count) Reconciled Sept 2009 (still worth it)
We are here to support you. Let us know how you are when you can and we will be there for you as you take each step.
While we often don't like the information we get, information is power when we are looking for assistance and solutions. Think about the power you have now that you know the diagnosis.
You are a great mom but I think you know that.
Hug your two amazing kids tonight, make a cup of tea for yourself and know that many people from the "States" are thinking of you.
If I was talking to my wife I could get you some great advice she is an autism major in special education. But sorry that isn't going to happen right now. But you never know if you have any specific questions I could always ask her.
Thanks for the support y'all. It was really hard to hear that. It's true that there could be a lot of positives that come from this, but somehow it was still really shocking to hear it come out of the doctor's mouth.
It was also hard telling H tonight. I felt so sad that we couldn't have a hug and be there for one another. Although we are trying to collaborate on a practical level as coparents, it reinforced the loneliness of not having the other parent there to share the joys and tears of the experience. H did acknowledge the work that I had put into dealing with S's issues, but he kept his distance and didn't show much vulnerability (as usual).
me: 42 | STBXH: 41 | T: 18 | M: 10 | separation: Jan 3, 2010 | they deserve better: S7 & D4 current thread: http://tinyurl.com/3y8sxcp .: first breathe, then heal, then start LIVING :.
