It’s ok to think she is beautiful. If you truly love her, then you will see beyond the surface beauty as well. I believe you probably do.
Just trying to get you to see where your focus appeared to be. As a medical professional, it is sort of easy to do that. Separate the body from the person. But the two go hand in hand. In an R, you have to appreciate them both. And if you appreciate and love what is on the inside, then what is on the outside, is not so important.
You are doing well my friend.
"Acceptance doesn't mean resignation. It means understanding that something is what it is and there's got to be a way through it."--Michael J. Fox