Women with HD...is it true or just situational?

[Jayce]

During most of 2008 & 2009 I was posting regularly, expressing my anguish regarding my H's LD. I read many of the books recommended by others here & added a few of my own. "Sex on the Brain" by Dr. Amen (He's on educational TV sometimes)was enlightening - SO enlightening! Human physiology is complex, and in our brains, its absolutely hilarious, tragic, frustrating and exhilarating in phases. When a relationship or attraction is new, our brains are flooded with chemicals that fade as that 'newness' wears off. Meanwhile it clouds our judgement, causes us to see our lovers in a rosy haze.......is a hell of a lot of fun......makes us feel so loved, alive & sexy!

So, yes, the gradual lessening of that initial high is normal. That doesn't mean it disappears forever, unless the two of you were a bad match or had negative baggage to begin with.

I am not a raving sex maniac. Not a 'nympho' (hate that word) but do have a higher libido than my H. Which meant that it was probably inevitable that I'd be doing the SSW thing eventually. You guys have hormonal problems as you age,too, don't forget. That old "T" gets lower along with your "equipment". Without an intimate connection & strong habit of communicating, that's extremely difficult to resolve. All the issues like rejection, body image, feeling as if one can't turn one's spouse on, are there for an HD wife as they are for an HD husband. The fear that you'll never have sex again heightens desire-those brain chemicals again.

Do read the book, even if it sounds frivolous. It isn't. It won't solve your problem, but will give you a ton of insight. *So THAT's what was wrong with Tiger Woods......**

Meanwhile, know that we 'higher desire than our H's' women are empathetic. Hang tough,
Jayce