One more thing, I want you to know that I "understand" your reasons for wanting her to come home early. I understand how you want her to be there for the kids. But, how would she react if you and the kids did not wait for her to come home for dinner? What if you did not call asking her if she was leaving on time? What if she came home to see you and the children already in the middle of your meal and having a fine time? Don't you think that she acts angry b/c you are trying to "force" her to be there? I think that is exacly what you are doing. I think you may have refered to it as being a respectful thing to do.....and I understand, but I also know how she (the WAW) is feeling. I believe everytime you call her to see if she's going to be home early, she resents it with every fiber of her being. My own H has his ways of doing things like that, too. She will begin to show her anger in other ways if this continues.
She's a big girl and she knows what her responsibilites are to her family. You need to act as if you realize that she knows, and go on with whatever you & the kids are doing. She will either join in and do what she should, or she will suffer the loss. Either way, you don't need to try to make her do the right thing. This thing with her and the kids has been your "button" since the beginning and you come across to her in an unattractive manner......I think. I just believe this thing about her leaving the job on time to get home early is not working with you trying to control what she does.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
