i am trying to be optimistic that by the end of my lease he will want to talk about me moving in with him, but that of course, is outside of my control. i know i just have to remember that god will take care of me no matter what, it's just so hard to let go of that urge to control things sometimes.

i have to wonder how much he is motivated by guilt right now. he just emailed me to apologize AGAIN for not "keeping it together" at lunch today, which i told him to not worry about.

he did also say that his mom decided it was best for the girls (his sisters, both 14) if i didn't come to the talent show. and he apologized for that, too.

what's with all the apologies? i told him i don't want him to feel like the "bad guy" for doing what he feels like he needs to do.

Me30 H29
M2.5 T5
H moved out 1/23/2010
H wants signed agreement 3/30/2010
...feeling hopeless