You may *want* your children to have a very involved father if you and your H divorce however that is not something you can control at all. And yes, you and your H will have to work as co-parents for a very long time since your children are young but what you *want* to happen within the R of your children and their dad is not something you can "fix" or "create".
The more you do that now (put yourself at the mercy of your H's schedule so he can be the parent you want him to be), the bigger disappoint you are setting yourself up for if you do divorce.
I understand you want to be the advocate for your children and you should certainly follow that path. It is up to your H, not you to create a strong father/child(ren) R.
