Sandi - thanks. It is definetly hard to keep my sanity and remember to stick to the 180 as best can be, when most of the time I want to vent my anger at my wife. I guess I try to think of one of three things:
1 - The comment about not believing what you hear and less than 50% of what you see 2 - My future with my kids, and knowing I need to be strong for them too 3 - Cultivating the image of the calm, collective, got it together man who is not panicing and facing this adversity with strength
It is not easy, but I find when I am angry if I can just get one of those 3 things in my head quickly, I can control my anger and not say anything or just turn and walk away calmly. Also - I have sort of challenged myself and convinced myself if I can weather all of this, stay strong, be calm, not panic, I will have a life somewhere down the road with or without her, but either way a life, and find some peace and happiness. Always easier to say here - but I'm trying. Today - obviously - I am better mentally than yesterday - take one day at a time. More later...
Me: 48 W: 47 M: 25 years T: 30 years S24, D21, D11 Bomb dropped: "Not in love with you" 10/09 Separated Feb 2010
