I think I may have made a mistake. My SIL called today (not a frequent thing, but she has called me a couple of times since the bomb). She asked how we were doing and I launched into my main skepticism litany (he-is-trying-and-there-are-baby-steps-and-we-spend-a-lot-of-time-together-BUT-OW-is-still-there-and-he-has-not-made-any-moves-to-get-rid-of-her-so-I-do-not-think-it-is-going-to-work-at-all).
Up to there it was fine (she actually thinks I've taken too much and should have kicked her brother out in the wilderness long ago), but then I overstepped the line and told her all the resentment I have on his working so much but not having brought any money home (it is actually my salary that sustains us). He says his office just breaks even, but it is OW who controls billing, bank accounts and collections. And he pays her salary, her daughters' and her SUV. So all the time he is away working, is not for me or my D (though he does put a monthly amount in her college fund), but to keep OW in the style she is used to. Talk about a kept woman! That is why I resent so much his work. It does not bring us anything and takes away time from us.
It is not that is not true, but after I told her I thought it was not a good move. It is making him look bad on her eyes. I should not be badmouthing him to his only sister.
On the other hand, I may have helped. She was concerned that her B might be mad at her because he had not called her in two months (since the vacations we spent at her place, that ended up with him moving back in). I had to remind her that in the 12 years we've been married he has never called her unless it was for some piece of 'bussiness.' Then she realized that all his calls last year had been because of their mother's illness.
Well, who knows? What is done is done! What do you guys think?
"You don't throw a whole life away just 'cause it's banged up a little"
Tom Smith in "Seabiscuit"
