Excellent work, you are in a great position here... often the OW or OM is single and you have no recourse.
In this case the pressure to end the affair is twice as strong.
Your H and the OW are likley going to try to keep you two apart... you are going to see a mirror image here... YOU two can split them up... but YOU two need to get together..
Spouses in these situations are usually helpful and cooperative to someone going though the same thing...
I think you are going to do really well here, you are in a good situation and have a lot of opportunity to apply a lot of pressure on your H to end this affair.
Once the affair is over then you let him work off the withdrawal and you two can decide what to do about your marriage.
While there's an affair going on... No decisions should take place and I would tell your H that too.. you don't want to hear what he has to say while he's cheating on you.
And yes it is still cheating even if you know... don't let him try to tell you different.
Do everything you can to get in contact with the OM and get him to come to your place... surprise your H, i would love to be there when he comes home and the OWH is in the living room lol
