Tonight I dropped my D at gymnastics and watched the other parents dropping their kids too. Each week I spend time with these people waiting for our kids to finish and we talk or I just hear others talking. It struck me tonight how all these people are so secure in their little family worlds, their whole sense of being and purpose is consumed by that reality. Yet, none of them realize that just like that it can be ripped away from you. One email that you shouldn't have read, the card you read that wasn't meant for you...and then suddenly everything you've known and lived for is torn to shreds and left in pieces on the floor around you...just like that. I know I used to see my home as a place of security, a fortress from the world...it was my world. What would we all do this weekend, should we tell so and so that we'd be at their get together next week, what about shopping and D12 has an appointment next week...Now, I come home to a turtle and he doesn't give a damn what we do! My home is now a place I try to figure out how not to be alone in for too long.
One of the reasons I returned to faith was the realization that the things I saw as rock solid, as anchors in my life can be taken away just like that and then what's left. Yes, indeed. So, those are my thoughts tonight as I head out to church (my turtle is OK with me being out, he's a sport!). Yes, they appear to be downer thoughts but hey the shrink says I'm supposed to feel my grief...so far so good!
Later Dbers


Divorced February 27, 2012.

"Only by love is love awakened".~ Ellen G White