From my unfortunate mediator experience, I can tell you a few things to watch out for:
- Get blank Financial Affidavits and fill them out before first meeting if possible. Why waste time there being given them and told what to do?
- Line up a L to review Final Agreement at the end and, if needed, guide you during the process as well.
- Keep in mind that unlike "normal" L-to-L divorces, you are always there, always negotiating face-to-face and side-by-side with your wife. The same toxic dynamics and emotions that got you to this point in the first place just fill the room and taint all the proceedings.
- It may cost more, time-wise, but if you're asked to "give", to concede on something, do not answer except with, "I'll think about that and get back to you."
- Some mediators have been suspected of subtly "siding" with the party that first contacted them/contracted with them, so beware, be on the lookout.
- Some mediators have been suspected of subtly "siding" with the same-gender spouse, so again beware and be on the lookout.
Hope this helps. If I think of any more, I'll let you know.
In the meantime you can look at my Mediator experience and meltdown on my thread. May not be a lot of hard info there, though. Mainly b!tching.
Gardener
"My soul, be satisfied with flowers, With fruit, with weeds even; but gather them In the one garden you may call your own." Cyrano deBergerac
