Boy Flowmom,
I don't have any great advice. Seems like he is lost for the moment.

How are you able to have two places to live when the financial situation is so dire? I may has missed something in your posts...

How are the kids handling this?

M38, H37
S3, S7
Together 15 yrs
Married 8 yrs
Bomb July 2008
Inhouse separation
"I hate you" "We are over" (too many times to count)
Reconciled Sept 2009 (still worth it)