I would still like my marriage to work out somehow, but I honestly can’t see him ever coming back. If that is what he decides, I’m ok with that too. I know that he is angry and scared, and that a lot of what he says is empty threats. I’m going to really start DB’ing, but mainly for me not him. Him having an A is not a deal breaker for me.

I’m still not sure how I should let the OWH now, I agree 100% that he deserves to know. In addition, should I be telling family and friends? I need advice on how to deal with my H when I do have to see or talk to him. Now that the affair is exposed, do I change any of my DB’ing techniques?

Together 16 years
Married 12 years
Me 36
H 34
D9 & S6
Separated 12/3/09
Confirmed A 1/25/10
Exposed A 1/26/10
H hired L, but not filed yet 1/27/10