You can all say what you want about paying attention to V day as not meaning anything to her. But I guarantee you, if you do nothing, she will really hate you! Now, maybe that is what you want, if so, so be it. But if it's not what you want, I say, buy a da*m box of candy or a dozen roses at the supermarket. It's not that much skin off your nose. Especially if the kids are watching (which they are). You can say that it is for all your sweethearts, and just refer to the whole family.
My W won't hate me for not getting a gift on V-day, I think she would realize why. However...you hit on an excellent point: my kids ARE watching and have no idea their parents are on the brink of a divorce, so that is a major concern of mine.
