He said he is done!!

[trytryagain]

lng-

although i don't have 20 years with my H like you, i feel your pain. even after 2 years of being married, waking up in an empty bed seems like the hardest thing on earth. i always assumed he would be there and i find myself waking up each day and forgetting for half a second that he's gone, and i reach out for him. or i'll come home and call out his name, only to remember that he's not there. he hasn't even moved out yet, but has been sleeping on a friend's couch and plans to move out this weekend. we don't have any children so after he moves out i won't have the opportunity for much daily interaction with him. i know it's the hardest thing on earth to put on your game face right now and smile and be pleasant to him when what you really want to do is throw yourself at his feet and cry. i live that every day. lots of us do. i'm supposed to have lunch with my H today to go over separation papers. and i have to do it with a smile on my face. this is what he wants. whether or not it's what i want is besides the point because it's what he wants and needs right now. maybe he won't want or need this in a month or 2, maybe he will move on and file for D in 6 months. i don't know how this will end. but the other posters are right, asking him to read DB or look at the site is not going to help your case right now. trust me, i've had to resist the urge to ask my H to read them, too...i'm reading about 5 or 6 books on marriage and relationships right now, so at the very least i know that if i should end up having to go into another relationship later in my life, i'll be more prepared to not make the same mistakes.

but still. it sucks BIG TIME and there is no way around it. it's going to hurt and it's going to be hard to focus on yourself, but you deserve to focus on you after so many years of putting all that focus on your children. make your H remember the woman he fell in love with and married!