Interesting. Spent the holidays with H and the kids on tropical island (where he's working). Came home and got pretty clear that as great as it was, it was too confusing and we need to sh*t or get off the pot. Laid down the law that I will not be married to someone who has a girlfriend and that we need to get divorced. Now, he has broken up with her, wants to go into therapy and is heading heavy handed in my direction...it is not just about what you say, it is about when you say it and if you mean it. He knew/knows I meant/mean it. Now for the tricky part. I am not prepared to settle or gratefully accept what we had before. I was miserable. So, we'll see if we can create a new healthy paradigm. If not, I have been through the abyss. It will hurt but I will let him go and move on.
This also marks the one year anniversary of when he announced he was "done," wanted a divorce and was "not in love with [me] anymore."
