Maybe use the lunch as a time to say, 'hey look, I need it straight, I do love you and am sorry that I've not adjusted to your ADHD. I'll take the papers, but I can't move as fast when I am hoping you might reconsider giving it one last shot'
I'm not suggesting begging, just make sure the things you think he knows have actually been said out loud without any baggage or expectations of him changing. Besides, don't you need time to consider what the papers mean?
If my W said, 'I don't want you different at all, if you did I would like it, but I love you completely with all of your faults and strenghts that I don't understand' it would be easier for me to fully rejoin her in our M. In truth, she wants a change to her life as much as I do for mine. So can we do that while staying?
I'm not trying to defend him, just trying to give you a chance to consider that when things are rushed, cool and clear heads are needed. Facts are too.
