Spouse Suffering From Depression

[Lucky11too]

Sorry, just need a little venting session here. I know there's some good progress being made so I need to vent here before I go off on him (which I feel like doing right now).

My friend just told me that on H's facebook (she's friends with him) that some girl (a newer friend on his FB. From what I can tell, she works nearby the sports bar and must be a regular) wrote on his wall about all the shots they took for her birthday. And he responds that it wasn't that many shots. It frustrates me on many levels. 1) he probably goes out like this all the time and I have no idea about it 2) he told me he had cut back on drinking 3) He's always begging his parents for money b/c he "doesn't make enough and has no money" and yet has money to spend on tattoos, going out, drinks, etc. He let his car insurance laspse, his parents are paying me back for his health insurance, he doesn't pay me anything for our son, all he has is rent, so where is all his money going? Grow up and be responsible. I blame his parents a bit too for enabling him and not even making him accountable for where his money is going. It's one thing to help him if he really is struggling; it's another thing to give him money which only enables his partying lifestyle more.

Second beef, he had the nerve to say the other day that my parents don't help me enough and he knows this from the time he is there. What? You mean the few hours he's been over, when my parents step back to let him step up as a dad. How dare he! First off, it's not their responsibility to help raise our son. They take good care of me and help me in every way possible, which I am extrememly grateful for, but it's not their responsibility. He's the husband and he's the dad! He should be there for me and for S, and if he's not, he has no right to say anything about the help my parents give. I was just really thinking about this now and it's making me fume. At the time, I just said that they helped me more than he knows, but I probably should have defended them more.

I know in some ways he's trying, but he's still being such an immature idiot and it frustrates me. Arrrggg. (and note, I have not heard from him yet today...)