While I am here W cannot live her fantasy. Now, I'm not being Mr Nice Guy by allowing her to continue her adultery. What I'm doing is removing all pressure on her A by me leaving. That is the only way it may crumble. While the big bad husband is around they have to stay together as I am pushing them together. Their love will hold me at bay. When I'm gone they can have a normal relationship with all the boring monotony that entails.
TRUE....very smart to move BUT:
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I'm also removing all pressure on ME by leaving. Getting away is probably the best thing I could do.
This is the better reason to move! I feel relieved for you just thinking of it! I don't know how you handle being so close to their existence...you are stronger than you know!
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To show how much I haven't detached, I'll tell you this. I was thinking. If W did ever want to reconcile, it would be hell to do it up here. EVERYBODY knows what's happened. If I move where I am going to, then nobody would know us. See, can't detach.
Like I have said before and got 2x4 (which is okay...we don't always have to agree ;-) ) I just don't believe one can fully detach unless one is dating someone else or has divorced. Just my opinion. But as for you reconciling in your home town, it could actually be a model for others. i.e. to show that it is possible to reconcile after an A- BUT you'd have to flaunt your renewed passion, LOL. On the other hand, starting over in a different location sounds a little easier and romantic, too.
me,34 exH,34 S,16 months S:3/31/09-left for OW started DBing 10/09 d final: sometime 10/10 current: http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2022856&page=1 met in 2004
