Wife wants best of both worlds

[mishka422]

CTH - remind me, were your W's parents D'd? If so, how old was she when it happened? How much do you believe she knew about what occured?

The answers to those questions may shed some light on why she is handling this the way she is. Of course, it could just be that she doesn't want to own up to walking away so she doesn't talk about it. That's what my xh did and still tried to convince our teenage son that the woman he was living with, sleeping in the same bed with, etc. with was still just a friend and the fact that his mom was falling apart had nothing to do with his actions. It was just lovely.

As long as you don't start putting the sole responsibility for the breakup of your M on your W's shoulders then the girls will work it out for themselves. You can't control what w's decides to say to them in the future. We all rewrite history to some extent in order to deal with our own choices, but you can live in the hope that what you say and do will resonate with your girls as truth.