I don't even know what to say, here. Sorry to be so blunt. No, actually, I'm not; you need it. Have you even read DR? Go read/reread DR, especially LRT section. Read more posts here. I don't think it is possible to do more wrong things in a sitch than you are doing, frankly. Good luck,
Gardner, (and anyone else)
I own Micheles Divorce Remedy book...in the Infidelity section she offers two main strategies that could be applied to my sich. One is the Last Resort Technique (which I believe you referred) where you dont talk about the affair/OP and stop pursuit, essentially hanging on and riding it out. The other is the "after the last resort technique" where you decide not to have anything to do with your spouse other than talk of the kids until the OP is out of the picture.
My SO did this to me once before as far as leaving me, before our daughter was born, and there was a time when I cut her off and didnt see/talk to her or answer her calls for three days. She reminded me of this today as it was painful for her and said she spent those 3 days crying.
She's coming over tomorrow to get our daughter...should I just tell her that I made a mistake and decided that I dont want to see or hear from her unless its strictly about our daughter?
And as far as Valentines Day goes...if I completely ignore it and this other guy even does something little like sending her a text message saying happy Valentines day, wouldnt he gain major points while I look like a jerk?
Now that I know there is another person involved...it seems counterintuitive to not step up the game and try and do more/better things than the OP is doing. However under both of the techniques recommended...such behavior is recommended against...am I reading that correctly?
