I had this fantasy of going to an intimate jazz bar with a male friend, someone who would make me feel good. I haven't done things like that for over 6 years. Then I was shocked to realize that every man I know is both a husband and father. Then I remembered a male friend who I had some "interludes" with 20 years ago who I haven't seen much of since becoming a wife and mother. I thought I'd reach out to him on facebook. He seemed happy to hear from me and suggested that we get together for coffee, drinks, or lunch. He even suggested going to the exact jazz bar that I had in mind in my fantasy! I decided it was meant to be and said yes. He is a husband (I assume) and a father, so I wouldn't be looking to flirt or anything. I just want to be with someone who doesn't see me in my current somewhat pathetic context. I want to go on a pseudo-"date" with no risk of it going anywhere.
Match, meet fuse.
This, IMHO, is a disaster about to happen. You don't even know for sure if this gentleman is married and you're planning to go on a "fantasy" date at an "intimate" jazz bar with him, alone, and you think there's "no risk of it going anywhere"??????? Because you're "not looking to flirt"?
Most affairs start from much *less* combustible scenarios than that one.
GAL doesn't mean finding a fresh source for external validation. It means doing things that allow you to validate yourself as a well-rounded individual in your own right. That may include going out and looking hot, but not exclusively that, for sure. I just think you're playing with fire here.
"Show me a completely smooth operation and I'll show you someone who's covering mistakes. Real boats rock." -- Frank Herbert
