You wanted to hear from others involved with swinging?
I'm another one here who's been involved in that kind of relationship, and FWIW- it helped ruined my marriage. My H felt that variety was too important to him, and so he couldn't say that our marriage was the top priority. Also, he tried to convince me of the fact that me not being an excited participant in this was indicative of "self-esteem and confidence" issues. If you want, take a gander at my very first thread here, I talk all about it, it's the story of swinging gone wrong.
Slightly into that first thread, I talk about my he!! night, which is what I call our first swing experience. I feel like a very different person now than when I first wrote that. My friends here helped open my eyes to a very unhealthy marriage, and I finally got the courage to walk away from it over Thanksgiving. The whole thing has really messed me up, and I'm just now working my way out of it. Good luck to you if this what you both really want.
