I was thinking that also, but explaining that I think that he should have the opportunity to tell him. I don't think I want her calling him up all angry and going off on him (not sure that is in my best interest). I also think she should be aware that he appeared depressed before he left, maybe she can help him. My daughter who will be with me is aware of the situation and has her own pain over it. Although he is not her father, he did help raise her and due to the fact that her father had very little to do with her growing up she had him walk her down the aisle at her wedding last September.
No. Consequences for their actions. Do not shield them from that.
Not appologizing for exposure or speaking the truth in a kind yet direct way.
Your marriage can handle the anger. Your marriage cannot handle an affair.
Think about it.
He can spin his lies when confronted. He needs to see how this affects not just you. It affects many members of the family. Fully see the disappointment. Hear it in his voice.
This is a consequence of his action.
Do not shield him from this. Respect his actions. Allow him to be held accountable.
Do this out of love and respect.
It will be up to him to rebuild that respect between the two of them.
Do not support adultry in any form.
Buy not saying anything you are agreeing to it.
Flowers always make people better, happier, and more helpful; they are sunshine, food and medicine for the soul. unconditional love is awesome!
Well had lunch with MIL and she now knows everything..We both cried as we know that our relationship may change forever. My MIL is really a remarkable woman and I know some day I will miss her friendship. I spoke to a counselor at the University and it looks like I need 30 more credit hours in order for the state to allow me to sit for the CPA exam. I am thinking I need to get a job just to support me, try to sell this house, and do the extra classes that the state now requires. I should have taken the exam before the credit requirements changed. Oh well hindsight is 20/20 as I didn't work in Accounting I have spent the last 14 years in Finance. WAH came by the house (1st time in 8 days). I was actually kind of sick to my stomach as I didn't know what to expect. He dropped off some dog food, got a couple of coats, shampoo, and toothpaste. We spoke about what we need to do to get the house on the market. He said he would come by on Saturday and help me. No R or M talks. He only was here about 10 minutes. When he went to leave I told him to take care of himself. He stopped and turned to look at me and said "its not like I will never see you again". I just said "I know". I realized today that the hurt doesn't come from his leaving as he hasn't been very nice in the last year, and contrary to what he thinks he isn't all that. The hurt comes from the rejection.
Good News I just booked 7 days in Mexico (mayan Riviera area) leaving Feb 3rd. Just 2 weeks and I am going to relax and pretend my life isn't so screwed up.
I am having a hard time today. I woke up and realized I am really not that excited about my trip. I miss my husband and I feel like this realationship is hopeless at this time. He asked me last night to file. I told him there is no hurry we have alot to do to get this house sold. He really didn't respond. I am just so sad that this is what it has come to. I am waiting for him to file and just serve me. When I looked him in the eye last night I saw nothing, it scared me that he truly no longer loves me.
Also let him do all the work on filing , selling house etc... His choice so his actions and his consequences. Unless ofcourse it is in your best interest.
Also 3 posts ago you set your goals out. GO FOR THEM.
Flowers always make people better, happier, and more helpful; they are sunshine, food and medicine for the soul. unconditional love is awesome!
I am going with my sister. I told my WAH that I would not be here to take care of HIS dogs and that he would need to take care of it. He tried to pawn that responsibilty off on my adult son. I told him I didn't understand why it was a big deal, I am not going to be here and they are HIS dogs. He didn't respond. He has no idea where I am going and I intend to keep it that way.
I haven't done anything as of yet that would need to be done to sell the house. I have met with a university counselor and now have to get some financial aid in place. I do still need to find a job which I have been frantically looking for.
The stress of everything that is going on in my life is taking it's toll on me. I have never been unemployed this long in my adult life and add in the rest of the drama and I feel like someone socked me in the stomach 24/7
I am finding some comfort in the fact that all my husbands family has reached out to me to tell me they love me and are praying for me. They are worried about my husbands mental health as this is truly out of character for him.
His sister has a masters degree in chinese medicine and offered him some herbs that she think might help his depression. He of course declined the offer.
I have not spoken to him since he dropped off the dog food, although he said he was going to come over on Saturday and help me box up some of the stuff in the basement. I think I am finally ready to handle that. I will not contact him in regards to what time or if he is still coming.
