Instead of concerning yourself with kicking him out, tapping into anger, trying out new attitudes or even what boundaries are needed. This might be a necessary time to reflect on what went wrong.
Your husband came home and gave you a second chance, but now appears to be unsatisfied. How come?
What did you do to make your husband happy? More importantly, what did you fail to do?
If I remember correctly, prior to christmas you were trying to develop some mysteriousness and the illusion you were moving on. He saw a challenge and became interested. When he moved back what happened to the challenge?
Did you turn back into mommy, and home maker, and same old vanilla sex wife? I fail to see any discussion about how you were continuing to go out and continuing to create the mystery that you may be moving on or even that there was a happiness in your life that did not require your husband. I read alot of, "I'm so glad he's back" and the minnions shouting "good keep it up." Keep what up? Did you immediately fall back into old routines thinking that is what would keep him happy? When in fact that is what he was running away from.
How was the sex? You dont have to answer here just realize for yourself. Was it passionate and loving? Holding onto him so grateful that it was happening again then falling asleep in his arms? Or was it everything another woman might do to steal him away then a little bit extra nasty? I dont care to hear, just wondering if you were continuing to create the illusion in his mind that maybe you were no longer the same ol' britt and he needed to try harder to win YOU over?
Your husband is very involved in althetics. Do you follow his passion? Over the holidays while he was home did you up the activities: cardio, weightlifting, sports, so that he was thinking, that girl's really cookin'? Or were you cooking and eating and surfing the 'net? What do the two of you have going on other than the children? What do you have going on that he might be thinking I want in on some of that?
Realize, there is a big difference between what someone desperate to get there spouse back will do and tell you to do and how someone who is successful is acting. Were/are you playing the desperate role or successful role?
So, If your husband were to divorce you and now being single you had "needs" to be taken care of. How would you go about winning a man to take care of those "needs" (be whatever they are in your case)? You would have to be successful. You would do what it takes to be successful, right? How would that behavior different from that which you have been exihibiting lately with your husband?
Despite what people might argue about, it is all a game. A love game. And what works to attract a mate still works to retain them. Not everyone is complacent with history and familiarity. 50% of america is repelled by it.
Infatuation is driven by fantasy. A fantastic belief of what is unknown is better. That is why people become addicted to drugs, alcohol, affairs. Once something becomes "known", familiar the fantasy is over, and it no longer consumes ones thoughts. How much is unknown about you? How much does your husband fantasize about you? If he was do you realize you wouldnt be here looking for support?
