Mixed Signals or is this Limbo Land

[Cie la vie]

mhl,

That weight issue might take a little time to settle back in. I lost about 8 lbs. within two to three weeks as a result of my sitch. Lack of sleep, loss of appetite, stress and shutting down alcohol completely were the culprits in my case. I didn't need to lose any weight at all as I have never been overweight. The weight didn't start going back on until about three weeks ago. I'm back to where I want to be now but it took three months to settle out.

Need opinions here, too cold or okay, she is being pleasant in her communication with me via email and phone.

Good question. I will be struggling with similiar circumstances soon. I guess DBing protocol would suggest you might have been a tad chilly with your handling of the handoff. I can certainly see how much easier it is to be a bit testy toward our WAW's under most circumstances. Maybe a more friendly approach is in order. Look at this way you wouldn't be asking this question and likely would have had less to think about after the exchange had you handled it differently. I'm not being critical just trying to be objective about your question.

I had a a slightly testy exchange with my W this morning (first one in sometime). I was suited up and preparing to leave for work at 7:45 when she asked me if I was leaving soon. I said yeah why? She respond that she wanted to take a quick shower and if I would wait for her to do so. I said go ahead not a problem. She proceed to sit on the couch showing no sign of movement. I than said go ahead get going I have a lot to do at work today. I said it with a firm and somewhat bossy voice but it was needed. She popped off that she was and than said just go. I told her I can hang but you need to get moving. Minor stuff but definitely tension between us for a few moments.

I've kept my cool through most of this BS and on a rare occasion I show her that I'm not going to take unneccessary sh1t from her.

I am typically very friendly and talkative but that makes me feel good when I do that with her, and I think it backfired on Jan 2nd (cake eating). Do I stay a little cold and distant or do I act more like normal me the happy me, which I am actually feeling more happy everyday. I know Sandi's tag line says DO what works not what feels right. Being a little cold doesn't feel right so do I do that and give it time, or should I be more friendly? Taking any input.

I struggle with the same issue. I think being yourself if it is happy and talkative is okay but keep it brief, otherwise it can become a cake eating fest for them. Remember act as if.

NC is impossible with kids. Once the W has moved out (Sunday) my plan is to develop a game plan that is designed to limit my contact to her as much as possible. When we do have contact I intend to be upbeat and project happiness but be as brief as possible.