Please Advise!!!! I Could Use Some HELP

[newmama]

Hi Shasha,
I have been lurking but just want to respond to your last post. Good job taking the advice given and for wantimg to repair your M. Most likely your BH has been devestated by your affair, shocked that you'd ever betray him, distrustful and wary of your actions. He needs to see consistent change and effort on your part. IMO his distant behavior is a reflection of what I just listed. And of course he is conflicted about whether to stay married. If you give up now, it will show him that he was right to not believe you wanted to recommit to the marriage. He needs to see that you are serious and really truly want this to work. True remorse is doing whatever it takes. Now is also not the time to criticize BS for his faults. (I know it doesn't seem fair but you were the one to have an A so you have to clean that up first). Once you reconcile, then it will be fair to be honest about the areas that you need to see improvement.

I hope I didn't come across as too harsh; just want to be honest and DISCOURAGE YOU FROM GIVING UP SO SOON! :-)