I agree that you shouldn't talk about gifts or NC. If they ask you how you are doing, you say "Good! Thanks for asking!" If they ask you if you want to divorce W you can smile gently and say
1)"Thanks for your concern, but I am not in the mood to talk about it now. Let's change the subject-how are you guys?"
2)"Right now I'm just focusing on D and taking some time to myself. I'd rather not discuss it right now."

I have used ALL of the above phrases and no one pressed me for more details. They seemed to understand and I could tell no one was offended.
So I guess I just ditto Cutter but had some variations of "I'd rahter not talk about it" to add! :-)

me,34
exH,34
S,16 months
S:3/31/09-left for OW
started DBing 10/09
d final: sometime 10/10
current:
http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2022856&page=1
met in 2004