BUT, we were in a college town, and the bars were full of college kids, and the rules are just different. I'm sorry.
okay, now don't laugh, but I didn't drink till I was practically 21! and never had a fake id, or went to the bars unless it was an 18 and up, but that didn't happen much. SOOOOOO, why are the rules different? Not that I approve of any of the behavior, but just curious. what should she be doing instead? AND, the sneakier you guys get, the sneakier SHE will get. I seem to recall something Michelle said, about a kid doing drugs, and the parents sneak in the room to find it, or eavesdrop on their phone calls, or whatever, and the kids LEARNS by experience how to be stealth like and even more devious.
So, what do you do instead??? well, I'm not sure I know, but it is an interesting thought nonetheless.
I remember when my s11 was stealing candy out of our cupboards, and I decided to pray with him asking Jesus to forgive him and for him to have help not to do it, and I focused a lot on that, and it did work.
hey, good job staying strong today. Have a cry somewhere if you need to, it's okay. Don't expect anything today, it's not time yet, although I know it would be wonderful, but don't allow those expectations to lead you into hurt.
keep us posted to how the day goes. txt me anytime too if you want.
Me 33 H 34 S9 S3 M 6 yrs (2gether 11 yrs) EA/PA 1/2006 DB 5/2006 H wants D 6/2006 H wants ME 8/2006 H "said" PA/EA over 8/2006 H erased OW off phone! 2/2007
"It is far better 2 choose humility & change oneself, than 2 wait in vain trying 2 chang someone else."
G... snazzy shirt check, voucher UNCHECK! Just tried to print it and I'm out of ink!!!!!! Crap! And, he'll be here in 30 min... No means to get a new one. God!!!! No worries, though. We are going to dinner tonight w/kids at a Japanese fave of ours, and will be alone this weekend, as hardly any activities planned. I'll get the ink in the am, and print it for delivery this weekend.
Cutter... You don't have to tell me twice to get ice cream!!! Wonder if that's on the WITCHES BREW TEA diet!
ST... Hey there! Yea, that darned clerk! Need to wash my mouth out w/soap, though. Just back from a really fun birthday lunch for my friend. These ladies know how to lunch! 3 hours! I'll go into the "how's it different?" when I get back tonight... Trust me, it is! I think I still have a bottle of anointing oil that I used to pray over D18's room when she lived here! Guess I had better go use it up at the new apt!! Oy! Oh, and btw, she txt'd this am.
D18, "Mom, do you have a kennel?" Me, "No" D18, "Okaayyyyyy" D18, "(roommmate) just bought us a dog." Me, "Hope it doesn't bark!" (Remember the cops calling for noise issues, etc...?????) D18, "He doesn't. He's really good. We can have a dog if under 20 lbs." D18, "Why are you being so salty with me?" Me, "I have no idea what you mean." D18, "Sour" Me, "Bad week/bad month, I guess. It's hard on a mom. Plz let me be." D18, "Okkkk I'm sorry I'm such a disappointment" (Nice martyr job, D18. Not falling for it this time. That's a bait for an argument.) Me, NO REPLY
They can't even take care of themselves (is that a word), let alone a dog.
Off to the afternoon/nightly events!
Me-46, D-21, S15, S13
After many years w/my head in the sand... I FILED Divorced 6/2011
The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think.
(((((Mindfull))))) Been thinking about this today...
I think you need to let her fall. If she doesn't pay the rent, she gets evicted. If she gets caught with the fake ID, she pays the consequences. As long as you and H are there to catch her, she is going to keep on being irresponsible. If she ends up moving home, you need to set serious boundaries. I think that would include no drinking, and a curfew. She won't like it, but your house, your rules. Or give her a blankie and a pillow, and show her the door.
G... snazzy shirt check, voucher UNCHECK! Just tried to print it and I'm out of ink!!!!!! Crap! And, he'll be here in 30 min... No means to get a new one. God!!!! No worries, though.
Hey Handful, no worries is right. You handled it fine. I'm just ROFL picturing you. And you're handling this admirably.
I know you're going to enjoy dinner and alone time over the weekend sounds like an opportunity for good quality time. Make the best of it.
Originally Posted By: mindfull
Cutter... You don't have to tell me twice to get ice cream!!! Wonder if that's on the WITCHES BREW TEA diet!
Not sure if I have reason to whine, b*tch or complain, but here goes...
Mid-day I txt H, and say "Happy Anniversary! I Love You!" (I've only said ILY one other time this year, other than, Love, on a card...)
He txt's back, "Happy Anniversary! What do the boys have going on tonight? When will they be done?"
I reply back, "I'll be done driving to/from soccer/bball by 7."
So, H calls and wants to take the boys and I to the Japanese restaurant for dinner (Yea, no offense to the boys, but I can't wait to spend my anniversary w/them.)
We pick him up at home for dinner. He gets in the car w/a smile, and leans over and kisses me... "Happy Anniversary!" I reply in kind.
We have a fine dinner, but I'm a bit quiet, as he's really ticked at D18, and has made a few comments. I really just want to enjoy, so if I don't feed the conversation, it doesn't continue (right now, any other time, I don't care!). All other conversation is fine, and we have a fun time w/the boys.
We get home and I give him his snazzy shirt. He loves it, and the card I got him, which was cute/touching, but not over the top. He gave me this really nice flower arrangement w/this ceramic angel in it. It's just like one we used to have outside that broke. No card. I say thank you.
A few minutes later he's upstairs messing around w/the boys. I have this overwhelming sense of grief.... Grief for a marriage/wedding anniversary celebration of three years prior, and beyond... He used to take me to this really nice resort every year. Used to buy really nice/fun cards. Everyone signed, w/an ILY. Even last year he gave me card that said, "If I had to do it all over again, I'd get down on bended knee again, ... I'm just not sure I'd get back up as fast as then!"
He asks in an odd way, in front of the boys, what's going on, when I come out. I'm not openly crying, but my eyes are probably showing a bit of a sign. I say, "Nothing, really, I'm fine." (Don't want to say anything, and seriously, don't want to say anything in front of boys.)
H, S10 and I watch some tv together, and he has to leave to go out of town. H leans over and kisses me again, And, says, in an odd way again... I know somethings going on w/you. "Happy Anniversary, sleep well."
Me-46, D-21, S15, S13
After many years w/my head in the sand... I FILED Divorced 6/2011
The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think.
