Glad you had fun on your vacation. Sorry to hear about your W's flip-flopping. That's what WAS's do, so nothing has really changed. You'll have some of your own emotional flip-flopping: dropping the rope for real, than wanting your W back. Be prepared for that.
DB tools still apply: detaching, going dark, GAL, 180's.
I "oked to D", went NC for a month, had to see him when picking up my car. After that he initiated contact, so it worked to peak his interest.
In your sitch you haven't maintained NC for long periods of time. What was the longest time (no phone, no texts), 2 weeks? Going NC would be #1 180 for you. You can say you agree you both need space and keep NC from then on.
Regarding moving things, decide what is better for you and arrange it. My guess would be she won't let you in for a week, because then you can stay and she won't have a right to kick you out.
