I've read along with your sitch. My wife is on #3 WAW. I see alot of me in you, or at least the way I used to react. I'd get so stressed and worked out that I was having a panic attack, and that is NOT my normal, but I let it be.
Most of the time if I would give it just 1 day it would be much better.
I know that right now you cannot see yourself even possibly surviving w/o family intact. It's tough!!!
You've got to destress RIGHT frikken now!!! Nothing is going to be solved today, or lost today. You certainly do NOT need THE talk today, or even tomorrow, despite what you might think. Getting on here and venting may be the best thing for you right now, but you really have to get a grip and realize you don't need to panic.
Do exactly what the experts here are telling you! I love my wife as much as any man also, but after 3 episodes and feeling like you do on the first 2, I do much better following the directions here, and guess what-so does she.
I would get all jacked up only to find it was ruining my day. At some point she will have to make the decision to stay or go. Limbo is Hell, and that is what we usually put ourselves in when we get the cart before the horse.
In my case, she has moved out for the 3rd time. I may not be done-done, but I am done with this pattern. Not healthy for her or me. Luckily, all my kids are now adults, even though the 27 yr old son with mental issues and currently living with me says her first leaving started his depression.
You can only control you. Keep doing the good work you have been, but no matter the anxiety you feel right now-Find something that can lower your stress level for a few days BEFORE you have any talk!! Take the time to listen to those on this board, take deep breaths, and just calm a little.
