Can any good come out of giving W some "space"

[dday101798]

Its like she is battling to different people inside of her. She opens up and is kind when we are face 2 face. The phone is a different person, cold, mean, and heartless.

As a WAW once told me here, this is true, very very true. She is two different people inside right now.

In my experience tho, and I don't mean to scare you, my W was that nasty heartless person when in the presence of OM, sort off showing off to him if you will.

I think you need the drop the 'mental disorder' concept all together.

My W was the same. Addiment that D was the answer. Who cares of all the time we have together? Who cares of kids? Who cares of our possesions? MC? A joke in her eyes. No sense in counseling a M that is "over". That was her rationale. Me, I did the same, "chose to stay married" all the way up to the D and even there after. The cold hard reality.........You can chose exactly, but this involves the two of you, if one's not in, it ain't gonna happen. After all, did you say "we're getting married, even if she didn't want to, and got it?

It seems to me you spend far too much time trying to get in her head. This is non-productive for any purpose. You don't know what she's thinking. Truth be told in it's own twisted way, neither does she. So, worry about you, how will you fair in the event this goes to D and how you want to live out your life afterward. Let her be and let her have what she thinks she wants, you gone. In the mean time, get out there, socialize, do stuff for you. Live 'as if'.