I know my H feels very guilty. That is not my speculation... last year about this time he told me (and I was contacted by the counselor) he was in C'ing due to guilt issues. He went three times,lol!
It's hard to understand why somebody would CHOOSE to live w/guilt instead of just saying... "hey, I feel terrible, clearly our marriage is over but is there anything I can do or we can do to try and end things on a better note?" What would be so bad about that?
This is what I don't get and I know I will have to fully accept I might never get it. My H and I (before all this BS started) had so much fun together. We have lots in common. My H does not understand (or maybe he does, who knows at this point) that you can't take the good parts of a friendship and stomp on the rest and hope one day it will all be okay with no work!
I for the life of me don't get why he just can't address his affair with me. It is no longer an affair. It is a very, very serious long term relationship. It is NO secret and it has not been for a very long time. Yet he wants to hang out with me and for me to keep it quiet so his GF doesn't find out and act like nothing happened? That is not a reasonable request IMO. This arrangement has been offered to me for a very, very long time and it just doesn't work for me.
