Hi all- What advice do folks have about trying to have a friendship with WAH? I wish sometimes that we could just have fun again, no pressure. (But I know there would still be a lot of emotions there for me, even if keeping them at bay). No R talk, just a nice day or a dinner or activity.
Last time I saw H he told me it would be nice for us to be able to have brunch sometime or do something, but he doesn't want me to get the wrong idea or have R talks. It could be hard for me to do, but if it might help open his mind up to seeing me in a different light I would love to.
It's so hard to go from sharing your life with someone to completely not having them in it. I also feel like there was much light at the end of the tunnel for me before when I was working, knowing that i'd be able to cut back and have him support post-school..now I don't have that and it's so unsettling. I don't want to be dependent on a man but i feel like it's just me now and it's scary. Before when I temporary quit me job it was OK b/c he was there as my partner, and now these are no longer options.
I just wish he would give us another chance. Just when I thought i was getting over him, I feel like I am really not. Is this normal?
I find myself wishing I had talked to his mom or his close friend or someone else along the way before it was too late..but I know that might not have made a difference. I just don't get why/how his family can just write me/us off completely? This is a man I gave my life and my heart to. I also moved in with him right after my dad died and was processing a lot of grief in those early years that I don't think I quite got over. It would come out in weird ways in our M. But as a partner, aren't you supposed to be with someone through thick and thin? I just feel like the whole idea of marriage seems so fragile and impermanent to me now. It's hard to trust again.
Yes, of course I want to be happy again and find love again but part of me doesn't b.c I still want my H. How do I release this grasp? I can't imagine having that closeness w anyone else...and when I go out w a guy that I'm not that into it makes it harder almost, even though intellectually I think that's the right thing to do.
And any thoughts on the friendship/time together notion? Peace to all -hhh
