Hey guys.. I'm not frustrated about posting here, I have made great friends here who really helped me through a difficult time in my life. But like others before me, a time will come to ‘fly the nest’ and stop posting..
I started a knitting class this week.. OMG I am so excited about it, I have wanted to knit since I was 7 (tried a few times)! I am also starting adult ballet tonight, cant wait! I loved ballet at 4, but my parents couldn’t afford the fees. BF had his second golf class last night.. he was very pleased with his swing ! He has always wanted to learn to play. And we are looking for a guitar teacher locally to help us improve. And bf has definetly turned a corner, although its something he will always need to keep an eye on.
BTW, the decision to have children is in NO WAY to do with keeping him, worrying that he may stray again or holding our R together. I cannot stress strongly enough how incorrect that is and how secure and loved I feel, even if we DIDNT have children! My decision is not based on FEAR that he will leave or not love me anymore, my FEAR is my own and its natural to be scared...because I have lived a very free life and I still have so many things I want to do. But I'm sure we will cope and love it.
Walking, he was never physically impotent or unable to ML (TMI!) but he did have some mental issues about it for a short spell, to do with him processing his guilt about how he behaved toward me. From what I have read, that that is perfectly normal for men in Piecing and in no way a sign from the universe that he shouldn’t procreate!! We have talked a lot, over the years about having a family and its just.. time. And yes sure it would be nice to have a few more years to kickback, travel and just enjoy life with bf, but woman just don't have that luxury Kerry and the reality is that time IS a factor.
There is no benefit in waiting 6 months, we are fully reconciled and our R is stable. And after 11 years together, I don’t regard us as moving too quick on this!! I could even be pregnant already
And Kerry bf practically proposed on Friday! He asked if I still wasn’t bothered about having a wedding (owing to my feminist, atheist upbringing and it not being something my parents ever instilled in me). I told him things change.. I may have had that opinion before owing to my childhood conditioning, but I wanted to get M now. So that solves the riddle about why he hasn’t asked me! I could have asked him of course, but I wanted him to ‘own it’ and to have the joy of asking for my hand in M..
I can't say that my life and decisions are perfect, but I know I am on the right path...
