Trusting dont you find that the ex's back off from the kids when they dont get there own way, I have found that with my son, ex is full on when son doing and going where dad suggests, but if he says no then contact droops, these exes are like real spoilt brats xx
Mandy what you describe is exactly what my XH used to do. In fact the main reason D14 agreed to spend a week at a time with him was b/c that was the only way she could be assured of getting regular attention from him.
Me 43 XH 45 M 2.7.88 Divorce 7.10.09 Kids D20,S17 & D15
I am finding that the less contact I have with ex, the less he has with the kids. He also cannot handle any rejection from the kids. If they question his behaviors, he backs off from whoever did the questioning. So yes, they are like spoiled brats. If they don't get their way they act soooo very immature.
Me: 46 H:44 Together: 25 years Married: 20 years Separated: 11-30-06 Divorced 12-21-07 OW: EA began 2005 PA began end of 2006 3 children,20, 16, 6 ex asked for forgiveness 01/16/11
Trusting...I agree. I think the kids DO see the truth in all as time plays out.
My REAL comment tho': I admire that you encouraged your children to see their father in spite of their desires NOT to. That shows how much you love your children. You put your own fears of being without them...of being alone, aside.. and, you put them first.
THAT...is what CHRISTMAS is all about. Look at you :-).
HAPPY NEW YEAR.
FIB
Me 55; XW 47; 2 kids (S13, D11) Bomb 05/19/06 Original thread http://tinyurl.com/yg2ou2t Last anniversary 04/25/10, Divorced 5/12/10 Status: Loving father of 2 beautiful children;
I have had not much to report since I have gone completely dark. Ex has left me alone and not having drama in my life anymore is simply wonderful.
Kids came home today from a weekend with ex and bimbo. My daughter reported to me that ex is upset that I am not talking to him. She said that ex wants me to know that "he is not trying to get back with me", he just wants to give and get updates on the kids. What an idiot. I wanted that too, but ex was always lying, abusive, blaming, namecalling, etc... when we would talk.
Me: 46 H:44 Together: 25 years Married: 20 years Separated: 11-30-06 Divorced 12-21-07 OW: EA began 2005 PA began end of 2006 3 children,20, 16, 6 ex asked for forgiveness 01/16/11
I have told them this, but somehow ex's messages matter more. I just listen and change the topic.
Me: 46 H:44 Together: 25 years Married: 20 years Separated: 11-30-06 Divorced 12-21-07 OW: EA began 2005 PA began end of 2006 3 children,20, 16, 6 ex asked for forgiveness 01/16/11
Personally I think it's really important to let our children talk about the WAS when they want to. Most of them don't really know how to deal with their own feelings and are just testing the water to see if we are strong enough to help them too whilst dealing with our own problems. I think they use 'messages' from the X b/c it's the only way they know how to bring that person into the convo.
Me 43 XH 45 M 2.7.88 Divorce 7.10.09 Kids D20,S17 & D15
Me: 46 H:44 Together: 25 years Married: 20 years Separated: 11-30-06 Divorced 12-21-07 OW: EA began 2005 PA began end of 2006 3 children,20, 16, 6 ex asked for forgiveness 01/16/11
