Just b/c you have intel does not mean you are ready to confront. Confronting and not knowing how to do it could ruin your chances of reconciling. Take a breath and calm down. They probably aren't doing any more than they were before you got your information. I've read where one too many newcomers go in too big of a hurry to confront, expose & set boundaries. Wait until you are strong enough and know what steps to follow.
Have you read those steps in Dane's thread?
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
