was up there...now im down here.

[RonD]

Hey, undrdg, I've been where you are. No OM problem, but I had lost my wife for sure. There was NO contact other than what was required because of the kids.

I felt directionless. Like I needed her there for ME to have any kind of reason for being. It was tough, but I had to find my own direction and learn to be myself again. And a PMA was essential. Just like you, when I was depressed, upset etc. she wanted nothing to do with me. When I was happy, she was happy. So whether you feel positive or not, you have to BE positive.

I think you have a reason to hope for reconciliation. It took a divorce for my XW (now fiance) and I to find ourselves again. We'll be getting married again this spring.

I've said this on another board: you know what doesn't work and what sets you back, and you know some of the things that do appear to work. So, do the things that you know work. BillM is right, you can do this.