Don't know where to post this.

[loveherstill]

LHS - Something that validates is fine (more along the lines of "I understand why you feel that way" rather than "I'm sorry"). I think you started to get at what Gnosis said, but weren't as blunt.

Hey! I'm not blunt... I'm brutal... or sharp.

Sorry, LHS, life's too short to mince words.

I have started to say this often. I have also said that I understand but do not agree.

I validated her today on being a good teacher to her children (special needs preschool) and reminded her to be happy with herself as she brings the children great happiness.

I have told her that happiness comes from within and external validation cannot create true happiness.

I am trying to get her to see the good about herself and use that to balance the bad so that she may start to be happy about herself again.

I will no longer kiss her butt, but I will praise her on her real life accomplishments.

I am keeping the childlike state of mind in memory while talking to her.

Thanks for the help so far.

I am learning it just took a little while.