Will do. I have noticed that there is usually backlash after I surprise her or after she opens a little. I attribute this to it confusing her. She has asked in the past for me to stop making changes because it makes her doubt everything. She does not like to be unsure. But I can't stop because I see such a better man coming out of this either way. So I attribute it to the two steps forward one step back thing. It also means she still cares and loves me. So I am gearing up, scripting, and role-playing with myself about not reciprocating the backlash. Thing is it is actually easier now that I have chosen to let go of what I feel has been done to me and forgive myself and her. I do not get angry. I feel sad and I want her to feel better...I hate that I have opened the door for all this. But I also know I can't change the past. I can however change what I do now and the future and that feels good. Oh yeah I will shorten the conversation next time.
Will be home Friday and will be able to put to practice some of what I learned in the 5 love languages as well as some new 180s. Wish me luck. I will continue to post and if anyone has any advice or encouragement I need it please. Thanks all.
