NC - W vanished ...

[newmama]

I know all of the above is completely wrong. I shouldn't be trying to initiate any kind of contact or wave any flags. I should just keep doing what I'm doing and if she wants to come back she knows where I am. However, I know she won't come back. And this contact is a little bit of desperation to try and say 'hi' without saying it to her.

P I think I misunderstood? I think I forgot the original reason for letting MIL know you are still committed to your vows was because you were worried about rumors going around about you and D's mum. So now I think of the 180 you've done from being needy and now you are confident and strong, so not bringing it up makes sense.

However, I think to myself, do I sit around and ignore D's mum in the faintest hope that W comes back or do I get on with my life, see who I want to see and have fun with whoever I want to have fun with?

Is that the only reason you would ignore D's mom? In case W comes back? Then no.If it were to not lead D's mum on, then yes. But if you are being crystal clear that you are only platonic maybe it is safe to keep hanging out with her....
(just checking that slippery slope :))

I hate to say it but as long as it isn't misleading D's mum, I seriously think it's FANTASTIC that your W's friends saw you having a blast and it happened to be with D's mum!!!