feel like giving up - talk to me!

[Gnosis]

OK, I don't think that those 3 points are all that there is... but it's a start.

Right... next question...

Why would he want you? What have you got to offer HIM?

[luvless]

Are you kidding me? I'm such the awesome wife!...not only am I cute...I can cook...keep a nice clean house...am smart...funny...fun to be around...AND I'm good in bed - what else can a man want?

[Gnosis]

Are you kidding me? I'm such the awesome wife!...not only am I cute...I can cook...keep a nice clean house...am smart...funny...fun to be around...AND I'm good in bed - what else can a man want?:)

When was the last time he saw this package deal?

[luvless]

he...KNOWS it's here....he just refuses to bring out the best in me...


it goes BOTH ways

[Gnosis]

Um... not exactly... he's had a rare sighting every now and again. Only problem is... he hasn't seen her in a LOOOOOOOOOOOOOONG time. In fact I think he's probably questioning this creature has not become extinct.

Show him this...

I'm such the awesome wife!...not only am I cute...I can cook...keep a nice clean house...am smart...funny...fun to be around...

But not this...

AND I'm good in bed

and he'll work for it.


Damn that Gno! He makes you thunk doesn't he?

[luvless]

AND I'm good in bed

and he'll work for it.


Damn that Gno! He makes you thunk doesn't he?

LMAO!! I love you Mr. Gno!

[luvless]

so goes the rollercoaster ride......

Last night H started to be a little bit of a jerk so I went into the room to avoid him - he soon followed. He was being sarcastic at first and I wasn't having any of it this time.

We ended up sitting on the bed and he started talking about R. He said he knows he's been a jerk and he's sorry..first time ever admitting that. He continues to talk about his unhappiness and still telling me he feels awful about his mom being gone. I have kept saying "I understand" at our other conversations but this time I said, "you know what you're right I don't understand." That seemed to stop him for a minute.

He started crying (remember he never cries) he says he wants to work on our marriage - BUT - he is going back and forth (I'm so confused guys!) to his not being happy - he loves me but he feels lost!

At one point he took his wedding ring off and put it in my hand and I lost it! He hugged me and we talked some more. He keeps harping on his mom and I don't know how that has to do with us but I listen.

I kept saying, "I am here for you - let me help you get through this." The loss of his mom has clearly sent him over the deep end. I asked him if there was anyone else - of course he said no...but I dunno.

I said, "deep down in your heart - take away the resentment and our issues right now...do you love me?" he said yes.

I felt like he wants to tell me he wants out but is so afraid to make the move. He is obviously in a MLC and dealing with a ton of pain from the loss of his mom. I don't know how it correlates with our marriage but I can see the stress it's added.

I don't know what to think anymore. I am literally NUMB and CONFUSED...more than ever.

I'm curious as to how today is going to be - I want off the ride!

[Gnosis]

Congratulations Luv!!!!!

Last night H started to be a little bit of a jerk so I went into the room to avoid him

Well done!

I have kept saying "I understand" at our other conversations but this time I said, "you know what you're right I don't understand." That seemed to stop him for a minute.

Good job. If there IS something you don't understand, then it's in your own best interest to get him to explain. This is another form of validation.

I kept saying, "I am here for you - let me help you get through this."

I am in awe!!! You've left me speechless...

NOW:

You said...

1 - He needs to realize he has hurt me deeply and APOLOGIZE sincerely.

then...

He said he knows he's been a jerk and he's sorry..first time ever admitting that.

Completed.

You said...

2 - Tell me he wants to work on our marriage that it is a priority!

then...

he says he wants to work on our marriage

Completed.

You said...

3 - Be honest and transparent.

then...

He continues to talk about his unhappiness and still telling me he feels awful about his mom being gone. <snip>
to his not being happy - he loves me but he feels lost! <snip>

Completed.

You have your three things from yesterday Luv. Now what else does he have to do?

I'm on my way out, but will provide more feedback when I get back.

[luvless]

I feel at Zero! you see any good in this?

[Gnosis]

I feel at Zero! you see any good in this?

I see plenty.

Unfortunately you have let your resentment, hurt and anger cloud your judgment.

There is nothing he can really do to please you is there?